Redirect

Go. Go now. To Amalah's post for her son. I know I am hormonal. I KNOW. But the video at the bottom had me crying and snorfling and laughing...and then oh shit the UPS man pulled up. And I had to explain to him that yes, I am OK. It's just this video of this baby...and I'm pregnant (obviously), and...and...

He just nodded knowingly and smiled.

Charleston

We returned from Charleston/Folly Beach this morning. Joe's sis got married.

It was GORGEOUS. We did not want to come home.

Joe: "Look...that house is for rent. Hey...that one is for sale."
Me: "Don't tempt me."
Joe: "Tempt you? Let's just move."

Winter is coming soon. It has been cool and rainy for two weeks now. It was hard to leave that beach. We are staying put for now. But...

Things you should never say to a pregnant woman

Keeping in mind that I have THREE MORE MONTHS to go...

1. "You haven't had that baby yet?"
2. "Twins. Definitely twins."
3. "God, you're HUGE!"
4. "No way you'll get that baby out."
5. "You look like you're about to pop!"
6. "So, due any day now, huh?"

The last comment arrived today. I ate the person's head. It was tragic, but necessary.

I am taking suggestions for clever retorts to these image-boosting comments. In the meantime:

22 weeks...
























And today, 25 weeks...






















Um, I think I'm looking pretty damn good, in spite of all the comments. I LIKE being round. No stretch marks (furiously knocking on wood). Awesome, glowy skin. Not a hell of a lot of weight gain...'bout 15 pounds. Not bad for a 35 year old mamacita.

Geez.

Brief synopsis of the last few weeks.

We found a cool house to rent. Put a deposit on it. Signed off on the other house. Must move by August 31st. Yay! Owner of new house calls and says, "Hey! My neice is going to live in the house. So sorry." Retrieve deposit. Find different house by sheer LUCK. Have hellacious "disagreement" with Joe. All is better.

Get a letter from school about Seth. They want to discuss our options for Seth's classes. Of course, I am worried.

Go to therapy with Joe. Eh. New therapist I do not know, who spent half the hour talking about himself. $135.00 later, we're done.

Remnants of hurricane roll through last week. The week we must move. With a pickup truck and a Honda Civic. While moving, I get pulled for expired tags. I am hungry, wet, and tired from my six-shift work week. Mr. Policeman is an asshole. I start to cry (HORMONES SUCK), Joe pulls up, asks why his pregnant wife is crying in the rain, and we end up with seven good-ole-boy cops harrassing us. Now I'm hysterical, as is Seth. It is straight out of a scene from a movie.

Decide to take Sunday and relax. We all head to town to run errands, eat dinner, get ice cream. The car, as Joe put it, shit the bed on the way home. She basically blew her engine. But, with 207,000 miles on her, it was to be expected.

For dessert, I have a killer head cold. How can one body produce so much snot without shriveling up from dehydration?

So we decided to buy one of these.

It is silver. It is heavenly. And Oh My GOD we deserve it.