This does not qualify as food

Ok. Maybe I'm a bit fired up from the Patriots/Ravens game. What the HELL. Did New England make a pact with Satan? I think yes. GOD I wanted them to lose. Especially after one of their players taunted the Ravens coach. Taunted. I know it's football. I. KNOW.

So.

Joe has to make congealed salad for two Christmas parties this week. Oh, it is most vile. Please, look.

Congealed. Salad.

Food Network's site does not have a recipe for this. At all. Not one.

Marshmallows and cheddar cheese. Jell-O and mayonnaise. Fruit and cottage cheese, suspended in bright green gelatin. A quivering cube of food madness. "Congealed" is a word that also describes blood. BLOOD.

Why. Why does this abomination still exist.

I am going to bed now...

*shudder*